Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Fight For Me O God


In the midst of walking in the rain I hear your voice that says be still and know that I am God. At the bottom of the glass I find my realization that you are more than what I ever could have wanted. In Christ I have placed my joy. Not my works or my reputation because all of these things are tainted and full of emptiness and pain that this life has handed me but rather my joy is in the hope that my savior rules and reigns. I will not let you win Satan. I will fight and pray for what is mine. God has promised and He is faithful so I will sit in silence and wait upon the Lord and pray “thy will be done”.
I have way to much to do and way to much to get done. I have learned my lesson never take this many grad courses in one semester. I am being eaten alive and tortured due to the failure of my own planning.
I long for heaven today. I long for that place I have been created for. I decided along time ago not to live for other people or what other people say I should be. Because I am black I should love Obama, I love him in the since I am proud of him, but he is not a leader that I look up to. I look to leaders like Colin Powell, Dr. King, and Dorothy Height… people who carved out their own paths and insisted on facts and fellowship. Because I am a Christian I should “act” a certain way or believe certain things about views…. Well I don’t. I am not a stereotype. Because I am black & young should I have a baby? Because I am a male should I sleep around? Don’t define me; don’t put me in a box. Freedom screams through my aching bones, because I refuse to categorize. I am a free man. I am free to think the way I choose and to feel the way I feel. To love the color of any woman I want and to vote for whomever I want to and to say No to whatever I feel and Yes to whatever I want to. I will not fit into your box and follow your rules. I am a free man and because of those who went before me who fought for my freedom I will cry out and march to the beat of my own drum. I will not let you define me.
Every now and then I fall apart, I don’t make sense, I get mad, I sleep all day. Every now in then I just don’t want to figure it out or desire to do it. I just want a break. Every now and then I choose to give up and every now and then I lock myself away and breath. I am not a slave and I will not be treated like one.
I am patiently waiting for you to join me in this journey. Pressure off. Figure yourself out. Pray. Seek God. Find closer. Know that I am waiting and praying. I am not asking you when and you don’t have to give me a date, just promise me that sometime soon you will make it here.
Granny its been five months and this will be the first Mothers Day without you. But I am happy that you are celebrating it with your mother because I know she passed when you where really young. For that I am happy for you. Give Grandmother Wille Mae a hug for me and tell her I am still tall but not so lanky any more. Tell my Grandma Margret that I miss her and I hope she enjoyed the other day when I stopped by to see her. I looked for your grave site, but I couldn’t find it but I know that you knew I was there; you’re the longest person I have ever loved so maybe that’s why its so hard to believe that your still not here…
My Goal in life is to love God because if I do that then everything else will be ok…..

"Fight for us, O God, that we not drift numb and blind and foolish into vain and empty excitements. Life is too short, too precious, too painful to waste on worldly bubbles that burst. Heaven is too great, hell is too horrible, eternity is too long that we should putter around on the porch of eternity."

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Here I am.....


In all of this I am finding myself at a lost for words and yet I am found, solid and comfortable. This is paradise; home is where the heart is and I have arrived timidly at home. Cautious, brave, encouraged and full of fear; yet I have arrived. Sitting at the table staring at you- gently tenderly holding my hand out waiting for you to come and sit with me; holding my breath but confident that you will come in the right time, your time, God’s time- you will come and sit with me.
School is going well. We have a few weeks left. I am trying to get all of my papers, projects and studying done. I need to focus a little more intensely. Give up some sleep to gain more, it will be worth it- so I shall buckle down. Fight on and encourage myself in your word. I am happy for my close friends many of them in KY are full of joy; in this moment my love is extended to Derek and Whit; they are indeed closer than a brother. Ashley is getting married on Friday. We have been together since six grade, and I have loved her like my sister and now to see her dreams come true I am indeed blessed to witness this; Jake I love you and am happy that God brought you and Ashley together.
Church is well; college ministry is hard- really hard- but watching God move has blessed me; I am blessed to still be allowed to serve in His kingdom. Great pastor, great church- Great God!!! Michael Richardson has become my brother. Never would I had of thought that I would meet such a faithful and loving servant of the Lord; he helped me to cross the bridge to success- eternally grateful I am indebted to him forever.
I still miss my granny gran everyday. She new that I loved her and I know she loved me. She is in heaven dancing with her father God in fields of grace. I miss her, but I am glad for her and I know that she is finally where she always told us she wanted to be.
Focus focus focus; concentrate; buckle down and move. Be the person I was born to be. Walk in the victory that God has called me to at the cross of Christ. These things need to be branded on my heart, mind and soul for the next few months. Count it all joy is what I need to shout to myself in the times when I don’t want to get out of bed. Take care of myself and move forward. Don’t slack, lack or complain. Move get up and move. Go to God in Christ Jesus and move in His Holy Spirit. These things I will say to myself.
My goal in life is to do one thing: Love God- because in this I will be alright….

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Hero


A New Kind of Hero

by Max Lucado

I am the good shepherd. I know my sheep as the Father knows me. ~ John 10:14–15

BEHOLD A HERO of the west: the cowboy.

A thousand head of cattle pass behind him. A thousand miles of trail lie before him. A thousand women would love to hold him. But none do. None will. He lives to drive cattle, and he drives cattle to live. He is honest in poker and quick with a gun. Hard riding. Slow talking. His best friend is his horse, and his strength is his grit.

He needs no one. He is a cowboy. The American hero.

Behold a hero in the Bible: the shepherd.

On the surface he appears similar to the cowboy. He, too, is rugged. He sleeps where the jackals howl and works where the wolves prowl. Never off duty. Always alert. Like the cowboy, he makes his roof the stars and the pasture his home.
But that is where the similarities end.

The shepherd loves his sheep. It’s not that the cowboy doesn’t appreciate the cow; it’s just that he doesn’t know the animal. He doesn’t even want to. Have you ever seen a picture of a cowboy caressing a cow? Have you ever seen a shepherd caring for a sheep? Why the difference?

Simple. The cowboy leads the cow to slaughter. The shepherd leads the sheep to be shorn. The cowboy wants the meat of the cow. The shepherd wants the wool of the sheep. And so they treat the animals differently.

The cowboy drives the cattle. The shepherd leads the sheep.

A herd has a dozen cowboys. A flock has one shepherd.

The cowboy wrestles, brands, herds, and ropes. The shepherd leads, guides, feeds, and anoints.

The cowboy knows the name of the trail hands. The shepherd knows the name of the sheep.

The cowboy whoops and hollers at the cows. The shepherd calls each sheep by name.

Aren’t we glad Christ didn’t call himself the Good Cowboy? But some do perceive God that way. A hard-faced, square-jawed ranch- hand from heaven who drives his church against its will to places it doesn’t want to go.

But that’s a wrong image. Jesus called himself the Good Shepherd. The Shepherd who knows his sheep by name and lays down his life for them. The Shepherd who protects, provides, and possesses his sheep. The Bible is replete with this picture of God.

Eighty percent of Jesus’ listeners made their living off of the land. Many were shepherds. They lived on the mesa with the sheep. No flock ever grazed without a shepherd, and no shepherd was ever off duty. When sheep wandered, the shepherd found them. When they fell, he carried them. When they were hurt, he healed them.

Sheep aren’t smart. They tend to wander into running creeks for water, then their wool grows heavy and they drown. They need a shepherd to lead them to “calm water” (Ps. 23:2). They have no natural defense—no claws, no horns, no fangs. They are helpless. Sheep need a shepherd with a “rod and … walking stick” (Ps. 23:4) to protect them. They have no sense of direction. They need someone to lead them “on paths that are right” (Ps. 23:3).

So do we. We, too, tend to be swept away by waters we should have avoided. We have no defense against the evil lion who prowls about seeking who he might devour. We, too, get lost. “We all have wandered away like sheep; each of us has gone his own way” (Isa. 53:6).

We don’t need a cowboy to herd us; we need a shepherd to care for us and to guide us.

He’s not a cowboy, and we aren’t cattle. He doesn’t brand us, and we’re not on the way to the market. He guides, feeds, and anoints. And Word has it that he won’t quit until we reach the homeland.

Monday, March 29, 2010

ObamaCare... Passed


Why Obama deserves his health care bill….
I haven’t commented on the health care bill because I wanted to go online and read it. I went online and read the republicans bill and I also red the democrat’s bill. In truth they both are crap and not health care bills but rather insurance company giveaways.
The thing is both sides are lying to us. Democrats and Republicans, we fundamentally don’t have a health care problem in America. We have the best hospitals, best doctors, best prescriptions, best nurses, and best workers in our health care field. The problem is not access, but cost. People can get access if they could afford it. Here is the thing 20 % of what is in Obama’s Bill will fix the entire problem. If he just:
1. Allowed states to compete across state lines with minimum and regulations/ guidelines
2. Allowed people with preexisting conditions to buy insurance
3. Some way the government can examine Tort Reform by each individual state through participation with the federal government and the attorney general
4. Allow college students to stay on their parents insurance until 27
5. Pay for Medicare, by cutting certain programs out that only help lobbyist and not senior citizens.
Which these things are in his bill already and this is just 20% of the bill Barak Obama would fix Health Insurance problems in America and he would go down as the greatest president who ever lived. If he just did these FIVE things and these things are not liberal or conservative, they are common sense, and then all of this other stuff would go away and liberals and conservatives would HAIL Obama.
Here is the problem with what we have seen, Politicians walking around with “Big Balls” and what I mean by that is you have half of your nation saying that they don’t want something and you go ahead and do it anyway. As an African American is bothers me when people compare the health care fight to the civil rights movement. Barack Obama is not fit to tie the shoes of Dr. King or Malcolm X. so to compare him and this fight to the greatest leaders of our time is outrageous. Racial issues are moral issues not social issues and the two don’t belong in the same boat.
Now when it comes to the tea party movement let me say this I am not a far right guy or far left guy so I don’t understand why these people are so filled with hate. I respect their right to gather, rally and to vote the way they want. But to spit on someone, call John Lewis a nigger, and to threaten democrat representatives is outrageous. It is outrageous when it happens to liberals or conservatives. I don’t have to agree with you and I don’t have to like you to have a conversation with you and to work with you. This is the beauty of America; we all have the right to have our opinions. And as someone who is in the middle who follows all types of people from Colin Powell, Condi Rice, Ron Paul, Hillary Clinton and other middle of the road type of people I think that negative fighting is not good for our country. Make your argument to the end, but never hit, we all learned this in 2nd grade.
The fact is we know that our country is on the end tail of being bankrupted and if you don’t like the policies of the president or any other person you have the right to write him express your views and to vote your conscience. This process had gotten nasty and that is because everyone is lying. Bill Clinton said the facts the other day “this bill wont fix everything and it might make some things worse for some people but we have to give it time to sink or swim”. The health care debate is over for the moment and Barack Obama and the liberals won; now the test will be to see if we have what we have been promised. And in my view no matter who was in charge, unless it was Ron Paul, Condi Rice or Colin Powell, then any bill would have been crap because we have lost the integrity of moral judgment in our political process.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

Sitting


I am finding myself lost for words because I am finding myself falling in Love with Jesus Christ again. Listen I am not perfect by any means in my relationship with Jesus Christ each and every day is a fight and fight that I am getting the crap kicked out of me in but each day I am getting back in the ring and I know that as time goes on the blows will hurt less and the sting will not be so painful…
The crazy thing is that I am falling more in love with Jesus Christ and Satan is tempting me more and more… its so easy to sit and do what Satan wants… but the joy of knowing that I am being obedient to Christ gives me strength… I am more crabby, moody, people are giving me intentional trouble, school is a lot of work and the little things in my life seem to be making me crazy at every moment of the day, but I am going… everyday I am going… every minute I am going… Thank you Jesus….
Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord plans for wholeness and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope…”
This is the scripture I am holding onto everyday/moment of my life… I need to BURN this in my soul and remember that my obedience to Christ will give me favor with God and that I will get to know Him better. My prayer is that the Lord would sustain me and give me new desires that are not of this world and that I would keep falling in Love with Jesus Christ… I pray that I would continue to pray and seek God and pray for my friends and family everyday and several times throughout the day… I just want to sit in prayer… that’s my goal to sit in prayer…. God please create in my a place to sit in you… Amen…

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Will You Come To The Christ?


I want us to stop and think about how blessed we are to have our salvation in Jesus Christ and to be completely forgiven of all our sins. This is not a claim that we make based on our works to try and earn salvation or what “we can do for God” but this is something that has been counted to us only by the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. God saw this pleasing and satisfying to himself that God the Father would set up the execution of His only Son, Jesus Christ, as a sacrifice for the sins of those who would trust in his redemptive nature: this is amazing and all together humbling when we who have cursed God in our lifestyles and abandoned his truth realize that His sovereign hand has reached out to rescue us from hell.
The seductive allure of the counterfeit has confounded men throughout the ages when discussing sin and redemption in the church. The church has tried to appease itself by “working hard” for God, rather than been completely satisfied in the Grace and Mercy that it our only hope.

From the beginning of the early church this heresy has been an underlined shadow in our theological and practical ministries that is choking the life out of local pastors, parishioners and people who are pursuing truth. Paul writes the book of Colossians because this heresy is running rampant among the believers in Colosse and the attack that is being presented is undermining the identity and sufficiency of Jesus Christ alone for the believer. Paul sets the record straight by making the main idea about this letter to be: “knowing the truth about the power of the gospel (death and resurrection of Jesus Christ) and the person of Christ (the deity and divine) is the believers (those who have trusted in Jesus Christ) best protection against the deception that we need “more” than Jesus to satisfy our needs (spiritual, physical, mind, body, and soul).

Colossians 1:13-14 “He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.”

God’s grace and peace in a person’s life comes from knowing the power of the gospel. Money won’t do it, relationships with people won’t do it, degrees won’t do it and church won’t do it. The only thing that gives the soul any satisfaction is to know and experience God and all things in Him and Him alone. The reasons our churches are dying is because we have made works a claim of the gospel rather than Christ alone. Our justification before God was made whole the moment that Jesus Christ opened our eyes to see His truth and our sanctification was made whole the moment Jesus Christ called us to Himself in salvation and grace. We can never be loved by God anymore or any less at any point of our journey because we are not the determining factor in the relationship, Jesus Christ is.

God delivered us from the dominion of darkness and he is brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves. God has literally transferred us by moving us from one place to another. He has taken us from Satan’s dark realm and placed us into the bright and hope filled light of Jesus Christ and Savior and Lord.

God’s work of redeeming a lost people (you and me), for which believers should be joyful and content about is pictured further through redemption and forgiveness. Jesus Christ has bought us back and set us free from sin, death, hell and the grave. To forgive someone means to ‘send away and to cancel”. Through Jesus Christ death and resurrection God has canceled the debt of sin because God the Father knew that we could never repay it, so now we are laid before the grace of God and have been adopted into the family of God because of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ. In other wards: smoking, cussing, drinking, divorce, pre-martial sex, liberalism, hypocrisy, homosexuality, adultery, being a bad parent or bad spouse, murder, rape, stealing, lying, legalism are all sins that Jesus Christ died for that can be forgiven by God and DON’T DISQUALIFY A PERSON TO RECEIVE THE LOVE AND MERCY OF JESUS CHRIST.

Listen I am not saying that these things bring honor to God, we all have our personal sins and struggles, but what I am saying is that you can struggle with these sins and ALL sins and still have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ because your salvation and redemption is NOT BASED ON YOU, but rather based on what Jesus Christ did by dying on the cross for our sins. It’s not about works or “how good” you are. It’s only about accepting the free gift of Love and a relationship with Jesus Christ.

Will You Come To The Christ?

Sunday, January 31, 2010

See ya Later Granny Gran


Its been a long first month to the year but God has been faithful. I lost my great grandmother on the 19th she was an amazing Christian lady, @ 92 she went to heaven. After she passed I was going through her Bible and looking at all the verses she had underlined and one that really stood out to me was in 1 Thessalonians when it talks about prayer. Praying was the center of her being because she knew that in prayer she connected to God and to be connected to God is the center of the soul in fellowship with Jesus Christ; that’s were she wanted to be. To my granny gran who l love even more and miss every second of the day, you will be missed and I love you and I am so happy that you are dancing with Jesus in fields of grace, you deserve it.

Massachusetts got a new senator, a republican to fill the seat of the now deceased liberal lion. It had nothing to do with a bad candidate; this had everything to do with the health care bill. People want health reform they just don’t want government take over reform. This was not about the president or even the candidate that won; this was only about health care. The republicans could have put a shoe as the candidate and they still would have won because people like their health care they just hate the cost.

The President made his first state of the union, no surprises from my perspective. Washington will continue to be Washington until the people throw all of the bums out and start over that’s my opinion. All should go; I support term limits.

I am looking forward to a new semester, a new change in ministry and all that goes with that. My New Years resolution is to love more people like my granny gran did.