My Boy Lincoln... RIP

I woke up this morning and they told me you were dead and everything began to break down in my head. My soul cried. My emotions broke. My body was paralyzed. All I could do to contain myself was ask God let you know that I loved you. I wish I had told you more. I wish I had reached out more. I wish I had knew more. Why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you come to me? I know you didn’t mean for this to happen. I know its not your fault. You were trying to connect the dots in life and it didn’t work out the way you thought it would. Its ok. No ones mad at you. We all love you and were just missing the hell out of you right now. We promise to take care of your mom and sisters. I will be praying for them everyday. I promise to pray for your friends and if there is away for you to hear me or come and see me every now and then please don’t ever hesitate to come visit me in my dreams. I remember the first real encounter I had with you. Me, Steve and Scot took a group of you to church camp. I had in my group: Lincoln, Joey, Jesse, and Joey V. what a week. Remember the Gold Bond powder in my bed- every time I think of that I still want to beat you kids up LOL. From that trip until the day I die I will always love you and pray for your soul. I will never forget you and I know Lincoln that in your last moments that was not you. I don’t blame you for that. Please take your soul and be with Jesus now. Rest & enjoy the love of God. Its all over now. All the worry and stress and drama that you had to put up with is over now. You don’t have to keep trying to prove yourself to anyone. You are in God’s hands now. At least now I don’t have to worry about you so much. At least now I don’t have to wonder what your doing and how your doing. Now I know that you are with Jesus. I wish I had been there for you more. I wish that you didn’t have to feel the way you did before you went. I wish that I could tell you one more time that I love you. I know that you knew I loved you. We will all miss you sooooooooo much kid. Please Lincoln go and rest in the arms of God. Watch over us. Be our spark of hope. I love you kid.