Monday, November 16, 2009
The State of Black Fatherhood
I wonder what it would have been like if daddy had of stayed, instead of leaving me behind, if he had just stayed focus and prayed.
If he had been there to hold me tight on all those rainy days, maybe now I would know how to swim through all of life’s unmanaged days.
I wonder what he would have said to those monsters in my bed room closet, Maybe now I wouldn’t be so scared to fight the monsters in the closet of my life.
Tonight I was at a friends house, and this was a home. Not because of the structure of the house, but because of the family in the home. A mother and father with a commitment. children who knew that they were loved and felt safe, even though all of them are grown and out of the house. What kept this family sane is that they have two fathers. A father in heaven who has walked their days out for His glory and a father here on earth who adores each child as an individual.
I don’t think we as a nation can underestimate the fact that people who grow up without fathers and without responsible fathers become broken adults. Regardless if you have a step father or grandfather, something is still missing in the human soul when a person grows up and realizes that their biological father made the choice to abandon them. We cant begin to have to conversation about fixing our nation without putting this as the number one issue we need to address. Kids needs to be taught morals and God by their fathers. Kids need to be taught to stay away from crime by their fathers. Kids need to be shown how to be productive individuals by their fathers. We cant fix health insurance problems in America without address the heart issue in America.
We have over 2 million men in American prisons today’s. 90% of those men didn’t have a active father or father figure in their lives. 95% of men who end up on death row made it their without a father in their lives. A society cant train up a child neither can a community- these two things can function as positive or negative resources but A father must train up his child and tech him how to be responsible.
I was sitting at this table tonight and the I was surrounded by love and laughter and joy- but to be honest with you all I could think of, and this is not fault of the family, is I KNOW and am CONVICNED that I would be a better person if I had that growing up. If I had the security of a father, the comfort of a home with the father as the protector and the encouragement of a solid father- I know that most of the mistakes I made, I would have never made them- because I would have known my worth in my fathers love and in his security.
Today I think that the truth must come out, regardless of how evangelical you may be, we all must confess that fathers are a must in a society with so much distrust. We must remind men that if you create a baby you must actively engage that child in a productive raising with morals and goals and love- because you will change a child no matter what, but will you change the child by being there or by being absent.
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Just My Opinion- I could be wrong but I doubt it!!!