Monday, March 31, 2014

What Else Do You Have To Loose

Someone once asked me how do you go through life with all

the hills you have had to climb, valleys you have had to walk, oceans you have

had to swim and still stay in your right mind. How does your soul cry on a

daily basis and yet you still have joy. How does your heart ache and break into

a million pieces and yet you still have unconditional love. How is your mind so

stressed but yet you can find it in you to speak the right word of

encouragement. The secret for me is I have eliminated everything from my life

that once fooled me to believing that it would bring me any type of solid

eternal everlasting hope but Jesus Christ. I’ve had some amazing experiences

that I’ll never forget. I have had conversations with some smart people who

made me think out of the box. I have been loved by friends and family and I can

actually say I have had a couple of people in my life who have given me as

close to humanly possible unconditional love without any expectations or

requirement. But even in all of that I am only as close to being complete as I am

ever going to be when I am in communion with Jesus Christ. I am not talking

about a religion or even a church. I am talking about an experience in a

relationship with Jesus Christ that reassures you that your all will be well

with your soul. Don’t you just want to know that your battle is going to be

worth the fight? Don’t you just want to know that your struggle isn’t going to

be in vain? Don’t you just want to know that when the dust settles all will be

well with your soul? That’s what experiencing Jesus Christ does for me and I know

that it will do the same for you. I’m not a big reader so I have to have a

bible reading schedule and I have to get books that speak to my soul because

God knows what I need in order to make it just one more day. Sometimes depending

on my mood I’ll just put in some old gospel songs and just let the words sink

into my mind. It’s all about changing your thinking. And when we change our

thinking we will begin to not desire to be filled by the emptiness of the

world. I’m not saying to you that when you come to Jesus it will all be better

but what I am saying to you that every time you come to him he will make you

feel better. He’s not a God that just takes away your suffering for suffering sake; but rather he is a

God who is willing and able and WANTS to sit with you in whatever season of life you’re

in and really truly be with you. So no I’m not in my right mind and most days I’m

not ok but then I’ll just get around Jesus and declare or at least say to myself

“at least he knows the answers so even when I don’t feel like its going be

alright or even think that the decision or outcome is good or for my good; at

least I am assured Jesus will never leave or forsake me”. I cant promise you

that the outcome is what your expecting but I can reassure you that when you

stay with Jesus Christ he will help you to come to some type of conclusion,

ending, explanation, understanding or reason behind why you had to fight that

way and for so long. Be assured that Jesus wants to personally be involved in

your life, so why not let him, what else do you have to loose….. #KeepItMoving

Tuesday, March 25, 2014


As I sit and look back over these past few months I am so grateful to God for loving me in spite of myself and the situations I have allowed myself to be in. Since September of last year it has been a roller costar of events and emotions that have involved shocking details when it comes to family and friends. I have had to protect myself by being honest with my own vulnerability and weaknesses in allowing myself to create a healthier atmosphere where I can go into myself in order to save myself. I have gotten over the idea that everything is supposed to be a certain way even in my relationships with family. It was heartbreaking for me to realize that some people won’t change and that some people are just the way they are but it was also freeing because it took the responsibility away from me that I had placed on myself. I must confess that I still hate change and I am not one for new experiences because I am afraid of the unknown and the deep root of my sin nature is control. But what I am a witness to is that when you step out in desperate faith Jesus will meet you with a solid ground. God’s not trying to trick you or play games with your anxiety. He just wants to keep reminding you of his faithfulness so when he calls you will be able and willing to go. The reality is that we need to stop holding on to our past because we are doing it at the expense of our future. Remember some people just won’t change. Remember some people are too broken to fix. But also remember that all people need love.  I’m not saying overdue yourself and drain yourself when it comes to needy people. But what I am saying is to remind yourself that those people need love and prayer as well. Even if they drive you nuts which is hard for us people who by nature can’t stand when people get on our nerves, we still have to love them in the best way we can and for me these last months since September I have just been staying in prayer for people daily even when they don’t know it. I’m not bragging or suggesting what you should do I am just giving out what has worked for me when dealing with problematic people who drain the life and energy out of you. Stay prayed up and responsible and that will help you get through this life. Remember not everyone can walk with you down every road and also remember to be smart about who you choose to be wide open with because some people don’t have the ability to handle your heart in the proper way. Forgive quickly, pray often and remember the people you deal with are broken too, so find the best way you can to give them the grace that Jesus has extended to you… #KeepItMoving #ILoveYou

Monday, March 24, 2014

Say It Now!!!

James 4:5 "Or do you suppose it is no purpose that the scripture says He yearns jealously over the spirit he has made to dwell in us"


Why does stuff keep going crazy in your daily life? Why does it seem like nothing is working out and that everything you do it going up in flames? It because God is fighting for your soul. Here’s the deal at some point along the journey called life you must confess that God is real. How personal you think he is to your situation is another topic but just simply confession that there is a God out there is soul awaking awareness that has the ability to move you in the right direction if you are willing to take the class and apply the lessons to what the truth is. We all want to believe in our minds that we have the answer or have figured it out well the truth is if that was the case we wouldn’t be suck in these wild emotions that make us re-examine things on a consistent basis. With any new thing you do in life there is always going to be fear in the change but the question you must keep asking yourself is your current situation worth not at least exploring the possibility of what the God who knows the unknown is trying to tell you. You haven’t figured it out. You don’t know the answers. Your confused, upset and to be honest scared. So what’s the lost in listening, obeying and following what God is saying to you in your personal time with him. Your time is now to say to yourself “I declare my relationship with God is going to get better” and then to make it happen. Its time to break every chain from your life and move forward. Life happens, but remember God is fighting for your soul. #KeepItMoving

Monday, March 17, 2014


Daddy, (Robert Noel House Jr. AKA 'Big Yogi' March 24, 1961- March 17, 2012) Its been two years today  since you had to depart and I will continue to cry for you everyday of my life. I will miss you every moment of every second of every hour of everyday until I die; I really haven’t figured out how to go on without you while I am carrying this sadness but I do my best and hopefully one day I will learn how to manage this pain. It’s like being tortured alive that’s the only way I can describe the depth of agony I am in; all I want is for you to come back and be on earth what you are now in heaven and yet I know that can’t happen; even in this moment I weep. I know that you now know how I feel and that no one else can understand or grasp this journey I am on and daddy that’s the hardest part wanting someone else to be able to understand what I am going through and yet recognizing no one can; I just don’t want to be or feel alone as I go through this process but I know that I am asking for something that can’t be granted and I know you are sorry that this is what your death has left me with.  I will mourn our potential and celebrate the fact that you are no longer suffering. I will pray for your soul everyday and yet rejoice in God’s perfect plan. Keep listening to me when I talk to you, keep hearing me when I pray for you and keep growing and learning all that you need so even while you’re gone you can be the father to me even now that I really need. Wait for me at the gates of Glory because I can’t wait to see you again and start a new journey with you in heaven. I love you more than I can say, I miss you from the bottom of my aching soul and I am praying for you still…  I hope you now know how much I really did need you.

Your One & Only

Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Your Going Make It

 I must confess and repent that since leaving Louisville and the death of my father two years ago I have been in a world wind of emotions that hasn’t always allowed me to perform at my best and be there for people in the way that my calling has made room for me. I was way to busy focusing on the “what ifs” and “whys” then to take the lessons of the pain, disappointments and sadness and use them for the good of God and to help other people. I think so many times in trying to create a new normal we end up doing too much and not realizing that the thing or anointing God put in you in the beginning will always be apart of your mission and passion but life calls for it to evolve as we grow and become different people as life goes on. Lately God has blessed me so much by allowing me to sit with people in their situations. I’m not called to help people to fix them but I know that I am called to not leave people alone. I don’t know what’s best for people in their personal relationships with God as he directs them but what I do know is pain because it has licked the edge of my soul and sat in the heart of my spirit. And by knowing these things so purely I am able to sit with people in the freshness of their situation and reassure them that it will be ok. Yes it will look different and yes it will challenge you and take you out of a place of comfort but you will survive. The gift is not in what you can do for people the gift is in what you cant do for them but still sit with them. You cant heal people, you cant get them to the next level, your not a savior but you can be a presence. I’ve recently found so many of my friends that have lost their confidence due to different situations. But the question that I keep saying to them is when did you start to believe the lie that your value is less because someone said so or because you made THAT mistake. The truth is you lived and it didn’t turn out how you expected it and now that you have lived in that moment will you make the choice to now learn. The failure is not in the living or even in the mistake; but the failure is did you take away from it what it came to teach you. God is completely in control of everything so if he didn’t think you needed to experience it then he wouldn’t have allowed it to come into your life because he knows what you can resist and what you cant and he also knows what you will choose to resist and what you will walk right into freely and because there is no temptation that Jesus himself didn’t face he completely understands you. So why did it come? What did it teach you? And how will you move forward? Those are only questions you can answer for yourself. So take a deep breath, say a prayer, listen to God and keep it moving. Don’t stop because you didn’t get it the first time around. Now is your time to know that you deserve better than what you have allowed. Its not the other persons fault so stop blaming them; You’re an adult so take responsibility for what you allowed. (You still reading, then your alive and ok); now keep it moving. Your going survive; your going live and your going be ok. God kept you close so you wouldn’t let go. #KeepItMovingPeople