Daddy, (Robert Noel House Jr. AKA 'Big Yogi' March 24,
1961- March 17, 2012) Its been two years today since you had to depart and I will continue to
cry for you everyday of my life. I will miss you every moment of every second
of every hour of everyday until I die; I really haven’t figured out how to go
on without you while I am carrying this sadness but I do my best and hopefully
one day I will learn how to manage this pain. It’s like being tortured alive
that’s the only way I can describe the depth of agony I am in; all I want is
for you to come back and be on earth what you are now in heaven and yet I know
that can’t happen; even in this moment I weep. I know that you now know how I
feel and that no one else can understand or grasp this journey I am on and
daddy that’s the hardest part wanting someone else to be able to understand
what I am going through and yet recognizing no one can; I just don’t want to be
or feel alone as I go through this process but I know that I am asking for
something that can’t be granted and I know you are sorry that this is what your
death has left me with. I will mourn our
potential and celebrate the fact that you are no longer suffering. I will pray
for your soul everyday and yet rejoice in God’s perfect plan. Keep listening to
me when I talk to you, keep hearing me when I pray for you and keep growing and
learning all that you need so even while you’re gone you can be the father to
me even now that I really need. Wait for me at the gates of Glory because I can’t
wait to see you again and start a new journey with you in heaven. I love you
more than I can say, I miss you from the bottom of my aching soul and I am
praying for you still… I hope you now
know how much I really did need you.
Your One & Only
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